I feel so lost. I feel very sad, depressed and worthless. I am 21 years old and I feel like I am wasting precious time that someone would make better use of. Also everytime I try to force myself to change the way I think and try to help myself, I get scared because I am scared of doing things in life that I feel other people find so easy. I'm scared of living, doing things on my own, talking to people, having a life, which I know sounds very strange.
I am very lucky and I appreciate how fortunate I am and how comfortable my life is, but sometimes I forget this. I'm a very shy person. I think I'm paranoid of people looking at me in the streets of the university, in pubilc places, etc. I've always been shy and I feel that no one wants to have me as a freind because of this shyness. I dont know how to overcome it. I've read many self help books but they do not work on me, no matter how hard I try.
I feel that at 21 that I should have certain qualities that I don't seem to have. I have low self confidence, low self esteem, few friends I think, and I am always angry it seems. I can't get over past problems and issues and, even though its in the past, I find myself drifing back to those moments and I get more angry.
I feel I have no one to talk to and, if I do, I would feel ashamed and guilty for not being more thankful for what I have and the great things in my life, even though I am.
I don't know how to help myself. I just want to be like other people. I seem to have gotten worse during my time at universiy while I feel others have flourished and grown and I am jealous of that. I feel so alone and that scares me
THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.