After much self work and therapy it is apparent that I suffered some type of traumatic abuse while a young child. My therapist and I have tried regression hypnosis and I just won't reveal those memories. All I do is cry. That part of me is just a black hole. I function reasonably well as a wife, mother, and employee but it takes a tremendous amount of energy to manage my deep seated rage. My therapist seems to think my inability to remember is related to my firm belief that safety is an illusion and I can never truly be safe. My questions is, should I just trust my defense mechanisms and stop trying to dig out these memories? I've been functioning with my anger and depression for almost 40 years. Should I just settle for this level of normalcy and be grateful that I've made it this far?
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