I don't trust my boyfriend 100% and worrying and being paranoid has really done a lot to me emotionally. He cheated on me once and I cheated on him once. He trusts me and at times I feel that I can really trust him, but when he talks about other friends that are girls I get worried and jealous, I think it's because I'm afraid I might lose him. I don't want to lose him and that's why I'm paranoid. I love this guy to death. We've been together for 8 months and I don't want to dump him or be away from him. I've dumped him many times before in the past just because I get so mad at him I feel it's the only way to punish him. We argue quite a bit but with time I know things will get better. All I know is that I don't want to be without him, he's the best thing that's ever happened to me. He threatens that if I leave him he'll kill himself cause he'll have nothing left to live for. He keeps secrets from his past from me cause he don't feel comfortable telling me but yet his last g/f before me was with him for 3 months and he told her EVERYTHING. I don't like that and I'm just stressing and not making any sense and I don't know what to do. He's really serious about me cause whenever I do dump him he always asks me back out and I recently found out that when he went to 'A' for a week on vacation he bought an engagement ring. I really do want to be with him forever but I don't want to go through the pain that I would go through if he ever dumped me. I would just want to die...I can't live without him. I NEED him, not want him... NEED him. I need advice though... I don't know what I should do cause this relationship is just really stressing me out.
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