Since I was in 8th grade up until I was a senior in High School (I am now 20 years old), I would have violent sexual fantasies, first involving me shooting up a school and taking girls hostage in the girls bathroom. I would then tie them up, suffocate them, and have sex with them. I also had fantasies about being invisible and overpowering women for sex. The victims have included my mom, sisters, friends, teachers, actresses and random people. I would watch rap music videos and look at modeling magazines to get myself stimulated to engage in the long, drawn out fantasy. Is this behavior or subject matter entirely unusual and cause for great alarm? I have now been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, because now the thoughts are unwanted, and because of my past I believe that I am more likely to act out on them in the future. My psychologist says that the past is the past, but now I have OCD, although I believe I am dangerous or have something entirely wrong with me, because when I read about the BTK killer, I found out that he had done many of the exact same things I would fantasize about on a regular basis. Does my situation fall outside of simple OCD psychology, or should I be seeing a criminal psychologist?
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