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Basic InformationLatest NewsBPA Levels in Humans Are Underestimated: StudyHow Well Are You Aging? A Blood Test Might TellDistracted by Their Smartphones, Pedestrians Are Landing in the ERAntarctic Study Shows Isolation, Monotony May Change the Human BrainAre E-Scooters a Quick Ticket to the ER?Sleep Deprivation a Big Drain on the BrainLife Expectancy Shrinks for America's Working-Age AdultsHitting the Highway This Holiday Season? Buckle Up in Front and BackAHA News: Regular Fasting Could Lead to Longer, Healthier LifeHealth Tip: Avoiding Cabin Fever This WinterKeep Stress Under Control as Holiday Season StartsThree Tips for Getting Your Zzzzzz'sHealth Tip: Creating a Healthy RoutineDon't Let Salmonella Make Your Thanksgiving a TurkeyMusic Integral to All Cultures, in Similar Ways: StudyAHA News: Eating Mindfully Through the Holidays – and All YearProtect Yourself From Frigid-Weather EmergenciesNot Getting Enough Shut-Eye? 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The Answer May Affect Your HealthYour Furry Best Friend Might Extend Your LifeWhen Income Drops, Young Adults' Brains May Suffer Blog EntriesYoga For Mental HealthHow Technology is Changing How We RelateThe Realm of Giving and GenerosityMindfulness for Busy PeopleEffective Listening in Small GroupsBelieve It’s Possible3 Ways to Know If You’re Saying Yes Too MuchWords of WisdomWarm Up This Winter By Embracing MistakesHelping Yourself Speak Your TruthWhat is Toxic Shame?What's YOUR Biggest Challenge for the New Year?Navigating Life's ChallengesImproving the Quality of Life as We AgeThe Third Noble Truth – The Noble Truth of the End of SufferingThe Second Noble Truth – The Noble Truth of the Cause of SufferingWhy Are We So Busy?The First Noble Truth – The Noble Truth of SufferingDiscovering Your Best Personal-Professional Energy: Reconnecting with Your Spiritual Homeland - Part IIDiscovering Your Best Personal-Professional Energy: In the Context of Health, Aging & Time - Part IGive Yourself a Break!Get a Better Night's SleepChanging the Machinery of UpsetWhy We Lie to OurselvesToo Much PretendingExcuses, ExcusesA Mistake Is but an Error: An Ironic-Poetic Odyssey for Human Authenticity and Audacity 9 Clever Ways to Gain ConfidenceUnderstanding Human BehaviorEmotional Needs - More Subtle and Sensible Than You Think Thought Versus RealityLife Goals and the Perception of Time: Do It Now!The Myth of Emotional SecurityHow Emotionally Intelligent Are You?Being at Peace with the Pain of OthersCelebrating Transitions in This Season of ChangeThinking and BeliefsWhat Will You Do With the Rest of Your Life? 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Both Can Make Us Feel BetterDeveloping a “Buddha Brain” Through GratitudeTickets To Paradise: A Good-Hearted TaleDo FreelyOrthorexia Nervosa on the Rise in the Quest to Eat HealthyWholesome Intentions – The Neurology of IntentionDeveloping An Inner Protector"Hope Dealers" Inspire Youth to Achieve True WellbeingLearned OptimismKey Points of AwarenessIt's Far Too Simple: An Adapted Zen ParablePerfectionism's Trap: Matthew McConaughey's Impossible ChaseThe Secrets of PersuasionRelax Needless Fear Around OthersEveryman's Dance Troupe Teaches Lessons about How to Live WellIncessant Drip, Drip, Drip — A Universal StoryYour Opinion is the One That Counts!How the Three Pillars of Exercise Benefit Mental HealthCore Beliefs and HappinessDo Life Challenges Make Us More Creative?A Meditation on GratitudeStop "Shoulding" All Over Yourself and Others-Everything in Life is a ChoiceA Caring, Joyful HeartThe Secrets of People That "Get It"How Socrates' Students Chose Themselves Helping Adult Children Affects Well-Being of Older ParentsAnticipation Versus Doing10 Secrets of Successful PeopleBinge TV Watching on the RiseMind Changing Brain Changing MindBeing Sedentary Changes the Brain (And Not for the Better)Are Workplace Wellness Programs Worth It?The Fun House of Mirrors — Seeing Light in EveryoneWhy Do We Fail to See Beauty? 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A One-In-Several-Billion ShotLet Things ChangeQuestions To Live ByFive Ways to See a Problem in a New LightAccept Them as They AreThree Components of a Commitment: A Universal ToolThe Long Term Consequences of Being BulliedBe Smarter than Your SmartphoneAccept ItHistory Shows that Exercise Boosts MoodMake a Difference Grow Inner StrengthsMeaning Depends Upon Context, Egos Make Up All the Meanings & the Context of All That's Real is Being Aware of Awareness ItselfPossible Direct Control - Staying on the Playing FieldMust You Win an Argument and Lose a Friend?Enjoy Four Kinds of PeaceLive Longer By Believing You WillWhat Do You "Have To" Do in Life?Posture and How it Changes Your FeelingsThe Five Businesses and an Inner Meter on Manipulation What You Look for Is What You Get: Learn 5 Ways To Change Your LookingOffending Rules, Bending Rules and Upending Rulers While Defending the Rule of LifeFree Yourself from Self SabotageIntroversion Gaining the Respect It DeservesEmbrace Your Introverted SelfTo Escape the Box, Embrace ParadoxA Better Way to Get Healthy Habits to StickTaming Our Inner DialogueSeeing Three Domains - Illusory, Empirical World, and AbsoluteThe Pros and the Cons of Cosmetic Surgery from a Psychologist's ViewpointHow to Cultivate GratitudeMotivation: What to do When You Don't Feel ItWhen Nostalgia is a Good ThingBeing Presence Itself - Enliven the Quality of Your LifeRelationships and the Meaning of CourageThe Power of Witnessing: How Would a Fish Know It is in Water?The Visionary Emperor EncounterSeeing Through the Unreal, Reveals Purely What is RealGet Out of the War10 Ways to Stick to an Exercise ProgramDealing with LiarsWant to Change Careers? 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Recognize Suffering in OthersThe Sixteen Laws of Emotions: Recognizing Moods and Emotions to Return to Healthy Feeling ProcessingWhy Time Management is So YesterdayTo Stabilize Weight and Improve your Self-Esteem, Research Shows the HAES Approach Is a Winner! “Let’s Just Wait and Watch It” — Let’s NOT! 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Empathy: It's About Happiness, TooBelieve It Or Not: Skeptics Brains Are DifferentSee Deep WantsLife Cannot Be Reduced To NumbersWant to Feel More Peace? Look at Your ExpectationsThe Anatomy of a Poker FaceThanksgiving and Gratitude in Hard TimesEmbarrassment: Powerful and PuzzlingDon't Rain on the ParadeHow to Make an Anti-Bullying Program a Bad Thing (Do Not Try This at Home)Community Development: An Untapped Resource in Mental Health TreatmentWant to Get Tougher in Life? Be Vulnerable.Regret: How You Can Reshape the Past See Good IntentionsShame: The Core of Addiction and CodependencyShould Doctors Prescribe Lifestyle Changes?We Don't Need to Wait for ThanksgivingNow and Then, Stress Is a Good ThingDon't Let Waiting Become RegretSee ProgressThree Errors in Judgment We are All Too Inclined to MakeTo Caffeinate or Not to Caffeinate? Making Personal Health Decisions Must Remain PersonalPurpose, Purpose, PurposeSpeak WiselyBe Sure to Taste Your WordsFeeling Bad about Being SadCultivating Patience in Everyday LifeUnexpected Causes of TirednessSee Life from an Infant's EyesNew and Old Friendships Alike Help Us Age Successfully6 Ways Mindfulness Can Improve Your Daily Life Drop the "Shoulds"If You're Happy and You Know It…Wag Your Tail?How to be Wise About FearLet It R.A.I.N.Why I Love Rock 'n' Roll: Healing Music for the SoulThe Art of RoutineWays We Think That Can Make or Break Us - Part 2Insisting on Fairness & Justice is a Recipe For Conflict, Misery & SufferingAre You Blind? He Said...Put the "I" in IndependenceWays We Think That Can Make or Break Us - Part 1Find Your Own WayThe Brain in Your GutHow Our Brains Adapt to Trust and BetrayalTech Support to Help Us Count Our BlessingsThe Risk and Reward of Emotional Agility: How to Know When to Let GoChoose Beginner’s MindAre Compassion and Pride Mutually Exclusive?Garbage Detection and Brilliance SpottingCan You Predict Your Emotional Future?What You Need to Know About Generation XhaustedWake Up to Good NewsWhat We Can Learn from Our KidsBehold the SuperAgers!Change the ChannelMental Health First Aid: A New Concept Helping CommunitiesFind ConnectionBottom-Up or Top-Down? How We Generate EmotionsFind StillnessThe Thoughts that Hold Us Back - And What to Do About Them"Off With Their Heads!"—Danger! Danger! Guillotiners Ahead! - Identifying and Protecting Yourself From Expediency-Driven Guillotiners4 Steps to ForgivenessForgiveEnjoy the Little ThingsAn Interview with Margaret Moore, B.S., M.B.A., on Organize Your Mind, Organize Your LifeCultivating Everyday Spiritual ExperiencesMinimize Painful ExperiencesConscientiousness and a Happier, Longer LifeTraining the Self-Care HabitFriends And MarriageRelax, You've ArrivedHow to Be Emotionally Aware - No Cat Ears RequiredHappiness, Sandwiches and George CarlinPeeling the Onion—Uncovering Our Wounds in TherapyHugging is Good MedicineHold Wants LightlySelf-Advocacy vs. Hypochondria: Where Do We Draw the Line?Trust Yourself and Take Some Baby StepsA Unified Theory of Happiness: Interview with Andrea Polard Psy.D.Why Support is Important for Dealing with Food, Weight + Body Image Issues Let It GoRule-Bound Adjustment is Deadening - Rule-Flexible Adaptiveness is EnliveningRest Your Weary HeadInclining Your Mind to Happiness: Just 5 ThingsThe Importance of Family Pets, Grieving the Loss of my Best Friend, Bonnie Exercise: Building the "Can Do" MuscleOur Obsession with "More"When Does Vicarious Trauma (VT) Become a Sign of Codependency? - Part IIGenerativity as a Path to WellnessWhy You Just Can't Stop Texting and DrivingGift YourselfWhen Does Vicarious Trauma (VT) Become a Sign of Codependency? - Part ICultivating Resilience before Mental Health Problems BeginA Mindful and Compassionate Approach to Anger in RelationshipsThe Essence of Healing, Governing, Service, Judgment and ContributionCreate Peace in YourselfThe Protective Effect of Having a Purpose in LifeEnjoy NowAre Mental Health Apps the New Generation of Self-Help Books?The Downside of ExpectationsIs Hating Someone Because They are Different a Mental Illness?Find What's SacredThich Nhat Hanh Shares Some Good NewsComplacency, Apathy and Resignation Be Banished and TransformedSuccessfully Negotiating the Crisis-Trauma, Grief-Transition Passage: Six Emo-Existential Questions The Benefits of Self-Questioning Part OneClean Air = Clear Thinking (Or How Pollution Undermines Cognitive Health)Having Trouble Exercising? Cultivate a Mindful HabitAvoid the RushMore Evidence That Staying Active is Good for the BrainSpring Cleaning for Your Social NetworkLessons Learned from Almost Dying: A Personal JourneySteps Back are Not Setbacks: Finding Solid Ground Can Be EssentialBridging the International Corporate Geo-Cultural Divide or Presenter Beware and Buyer Be AwareDefining Your Own Spiritual PathBeing Kind to Your Body is Healing to the MindTo Trust or Mistrust - Part IFind Your North StarChange Your Body, Change Your Mind Being Positional, Non-Positional and Taking a StandMen are from Earth and so are WomenMultidimensional Wellness: Powerful Concept and Practical ToolCling Less, Love MoreFollow Your Dreams Start Feeling Joy Now!What Can I Do? The Seven Options Available For You In Any SituationBe Grateful for the Good and Graceful During the BadIn Challenging Times, No More “Inner Child”: Boldly Bring Your Inner ChutzpahPay AttentionThree Components of a Commitment: A Universal ToolWhen Calmness is a Trigger for Fear and How to Change itRetraining Your Brain Toward Greater FreedomThe Grammar of Committed Action: Speaking That Brings Forth BeingThe Strength and Stamina of Your Willpower Make a Valentine's ResolutionAn Interview with Gerti Schoen on The Gentle SelfThe Secret Ingredient to Making Change StickBe BenevolentWhen is Compassion Idiotic?Inspiring Power and Partnership: An Interactive and Interdependent PerspectiveCatch A "Wild Pitch?" You Must Be Kidding!Breaking Bad Habits Using The Now EffectDon't Beat Yourself UpAre Reasons Complete Nonsense? A Three-Minute Course Admit Fault and Move OnPositivity in Relationships is ContagiousA Simple Life Lesson for Us All: The Late Shirley LevineAn Interview with Brenda Knight on The Gratitude Power WorkbookPut Yourself on Your Priority ListCan You Live Without the Internet?It's Shocking How Little People Settle For, How Much They Put Up With and How Much Better They Deserve5 Tips on How to Keep New Years' ResolutionsElisha Goldstein’s Top 10 2011 Mental Help PostsBe the BodyA Tip for Happiness: Turn Routine into WonderHoliday Blues and Depression Single and Alone for the Holidays? 6 Strategies for Surviving and Even Thriving the Holidays AloneWithdraw Attention, Interest and Feeding Unhappy Thoughts,and Natural Happiness Arises and BlossomsBack to BasicsKnowledge is an Obstacle to KnowledgeEnjoy Every Last SandwichThe Impact of Exercise on Your Mental HealthSee the Good in OthersThis Thanksgiving Try the Mindful Gratitude PracticeWant a Healthier Life? 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The Answer is YesThe Architecture of All Change ProcessesSee Beings, Not BodiesDrop Tart ToneThe Top Seven Sources of Stress and Their RemediesLower the PressureReceive GenerosityBasics of Living: Breathing, Standing, Walking and Sitting: Safeguards of Well Being and Listening WithinAn Acronym that Guides us to Mental HealthBalancing Joining and Separation Keeping It Real — Do You Get It?You Can Feel Safer: Is There Really a Tiger in Those Bushes?Your Primary Spiritual Relationship - Love for YourselfAn Interview with Lama Tsering Everest21 Ways To Turn Ill Will to Good WillGROKKED: Being Seen, Heard and Known For Who You AreA Phrase to Save Your DayHow Did Humans Become Empathetic?Am I Normal?Dreams: More Than Fantasies and WishesThe Wolf of Hate7 Mindfulness and Psychotherapy Posts You Might Find InterestingSelf-Responsibility/Self-Accountability Qualifies You as an AdultTaking in The GoodAcknowledgment Transcends Pride and HumilityAltruism: The Power of Social MediaHealthy FriendshipCan you Improve Life Satisfaction by Changing Your Focus?Video Blog: Confidence3 Steps to Say Goodbye to Old Beliefs that Keep You StuckThe Brain in a Bucket Developing An Inner Meter on Manipulation — A Critical Life SkillFacebook: A Cold Hard LookLife: Bringing Back the Missing Puzzle PiecesWhy Do Smart and Successful People Do Dumb and Self-Sabotaging Things?What's Your 500 Year Plan for Humanity's Mental Health?My Beef with the "Secret"Beliefs, Roles and Stories Can Be Useful At Times or Create Suffering: Recognition, Disillusionment, Disidentification & Surrender is Freedom Itself Want to Make Change? 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Consider this Strategy TodayPrime Your Mind for GoodDid You Know? Some Surprising Data about Stress Can Increased Light Make You Fat? Your Mind: A Blessing and a CurseAn Expert Interview with Darrin Zeer on Managing Work Stress Lessons Learned: Like Bridges Burned?Can How you Eat Change What you Eat and What you Weigh?9 Ways Mindfulness Can Change Your LifeHow Lucky Are You?Musical Inspiration to Open to the Possibilities of Life 10 Ways To Finish The Race With The Bear On Your Back!"So What's the Point?" Help with Finding the Answers... New Research: Mindfulness and Adolescent Boys Change Your Mind, Your Brain and Your Life! 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by Cheryl Richardson Broadway Books, 2000 Review by Christian Perring, Ph.D. on Jul 1st 2001 Here's a best-selling book full of advice I would be well advised to take, yet I find it nauseating. But then, that's to be expected -- I and the people I like cannot take self-help books seriously. Is it just intellectual snobbishness, or maybe a matter of personal taste, or is there some reason for the people who want to buy this book to think twice?
First, what's good about Life Makeovers? Most importantly, it encourages people to interrupt their lives and think about how they are living. It encourages self-awareness and questioning. Here's a typical passage. "At the risk of sounding dramatic, it's important to remember that when we put the needs of our business or company before our personal lives, we put our lives at risk. Not only do we put our emotional and physical health in jeopardy, we put our relationships with loved ones at risk as well. And of course, we damage the most important relationship of all -- our relationship to ourselves." (p. 50) Richardson can't be accused of telling people to just accept the world as it is. She focuses on making life more meaningful. She highlights the importance of spontaneity. She calls her approach, "extreme self-care." The fundamental idea is that "in order to be there for others in a healthy way, you must first be there for yourself." (p. 87). She argues that far from being selfish, this approach will in the end enable one to help others more. She suggests that most of us, most of the time, engage in inefficient ways of working and living with confused priorities. By self-examination, we will be able to sort out our priorities and live far more efficiently. Furthermore, Richardson is not snobbish. She writes very clearly, without jargon, for a wide readership. She has appeared on Oprah, and so has influenced millions of people. Her approach is simple: the book is set out into 52 chapters, one for each week, although most people will read the whole book in a few days or less. Each chapter ends with a "Take Action Challenge" and a list of resources that may help the reader to start working on the advice Richardson gives. She talks about problems that most people will have experienced: fear of the challenges we face at work and home, a sense of isolation and the need to connect with others, clutter in one's home and office, lack of exercise, sleeping badly, and so on. She has many helpful hints about how to deal with those problems. What is problematic about this approach? Richardson makes awfully big promises in the Introduction--that one's life will start to unfold in wonderful ways and become "pretty amazing." It's possible that some readers will benefit profoundly from reading the book, but I imagine that most readers will end up taking just one or two ideas from the book. That might be enough to make it worthwhile, but it will hardly be a radical transformation of one's life. Some of the advice is banal and annoying. It's a great idea for people to have fun, but to advise making a sign that says "AM I HAVING FUN YET?" and hang it in your home or office smacks almost of self-parody. My wife says if I did that, she would wonder who had given me a lobotomy. Some of the suggestions for resources at the end of each chapter are useful, but many of them are all-too-revealing of new age sensibilities: New Age Magazine, the music of Kenny G and Yanni, Hallmark cards, and Chicken Soup for the Soul at Work. This fuels my suspicion that this approach is for people without any edge or taste, too ready to immerse themselves in warm fuzzy feelings and nonsense about spirituality. Another aspect of Richardson's approach that I find off-putting is her apparent assumption in her suggestions that she is talking to successful, affluent people. She herself, as well as being a successful writer and speaker, is a personal coach. I don't know how much personal coaches charge, but I don't think I could afford one, and I don't know anybody who could. Since this book draws from her own experience and her experience with clients who can afford her services, it may be more specialized than readers expect. And although this is obvious, Life Makeovers is not for people starting out in their jobs and careers: it is for people who are some way into their lives and who have started to get stuck. Richardson would probably say that her central idea of extreme self-care is potentially useful to everyone. Most of the resources she suggests are not very expensive, it's true. Maybe we can't afford a weekly massage or maid service, but often the reason for this is that we spend money on other things which are equally expensive, and we could afford to pamper ourselves if we changed our priorities. I like that Richardson suggests that people spend less at Christmas in order to focus on what is important. Nevertheless, she assumes that her readers have their own offices and that they have control over their office space, so she doesn't seem to be writing for people who work in office cubicles or who work in factories, prisons, garages, department stores, malls, and restaurants. Richardson is a religious person and includes both the general idea of living a spiritual life and the more specific idea of praying in her advice. The seeming minority of people who, like myself, are impatient with talk of spirituality will find this off-putting (Oprah's daily section Remembering Your Spirit always has me shouting at the TV when I catch her show), but I suppose the majority will have no objection. Overall: There's less to this book than it might seem. It contains some good advice, most of which is pretty obvious. If you are the kind of person who finds self-help books useful, and you are among the target readership, it might well be worth reading. It is thoroughly shallow, never discussing any issue for more than a few pages. Ultimately I suspect it will encourage people to adjust their lives rather than to make their lives over, as the title, Life Makeovers, seems to suggest. But then a makeover is really just a improvement in appearance, and so maybe the title is actually being honest about what the book is promising. The best I can say is that Richardson could be helping the reader take a step in the right direction. Ultimately, I would hope that readers could undertake systematic and profound reflections on how they are living their lives, but Life Makeovers does not have enough substance to enable them to do this. A note on the audiobook: The audiobook of Life Makeovers is available unabridged on a 4-CD set, read by the author. Richardson reads her own work well, in a calm and friendly voice. The track division on the CDs is a little strange: one would expect to have one track per chapter, but in fact there are fewer tracks than chapters, so some tracks have more than one chapter on them. The tracks start and end at unexpected points, including in the middle of chapters, which seems ill-planned. There is no listing of which chapters are on which tracks, and there is no accompanying booklet or insert. The audiobook also does not include the epigrams that begin each chapter and the list of resources that end each chapter. © 2001 Christian Perring. First Serial Rights. |