The Four Stages of Burnout: The Erosive Spiral - Shrink Rap™ Version
Mark Gorkin, LCSW ("The Stress Doc") Updated: Sep 5th 2013
If no matter what you do or how hard you try Or how often escapes a bone weary sigh… You still can't say "No" or won't ever let go Because of time, money, and mostly ego. So you carry around a two-ton albatross - Not just a cross to bear; it's a bear of a cross Now, as they say, there's a big price to pay: The energy drain is the least of the pain. Are you aware of the looming despair? There's not enough sympathy to dispel the apathy. When once you were shrewd, it's now rude or crude Or you dismiss any obstacle with a laugh all too cynical Who did you outsmart for that burnt out Purple Heart?
You may wonder how I know what I know: "Have I been snooping outside your window?" Alas, like you, a once non-stop hero Flashdancing and whirling to that burnout tango.
Before talking burnout recovery, try walking a personal journey While I have written pages, let's distill critical gauges - From stepping into the darkened maze To a twisting path that may even craze. To prevent going viral, grasp the "Erosive Spiral" Let's erase all doubt - "The Four Stages of Burnout."
Four Stages for the Ages
First Stage
The first stage is a warning - yellow light caution: Physical, Mental and Emotional Exhaustion From nine to five you still are alive But you're not a dope; it's been a tightrope. You've made it home, like crossing a ridge The very first thing - head for the fridge. Get the Lite Beer or the Ben & Jerry's Forget the good cheer, just numb all those worries. Put on the big screen, so you're a slouch It's either "The Scream" or squashed out on the couch.
Second Stage
The second stage I call Doubt and Shame Now you know you're off of your game The growing fear: others realize the same. When finally asked to take on a new project You quickly wonder: "Are my skills really suspect?" And the latest rub: am I getting the snub? Perhaps it's time for the "Frequent Sighers Club."
At long last, you've had it with being uncertain Build an iron curtain around all your hurtin Forget about once being a charmer Start strapping on third stage heavy armor - You're not yet full of malice…alas, one big hard Callous. Though you can give a clinic on being a Cynic. It's time for a self-centered run: "Just look out for #1." Or you've seen him on cable; now do your best Gable: Sorry to tell you, ma'am; "Frankly, I don't give a damn!"
Don't fall for the hype about that "strong silent type": A bottled up shell is its own quiet hell. And at times "strong silent" is subtly violent: For me to be strong…you must be silent!
Fourth Stage
As you know well; burnout can be one hell of a shell With a push, that hard cover, at the fourth stage May quickly fly off into impotent rage - Failure and Helplessnessnow morph into Crisis: Caught in a bind, losing one's mind Damned if I do, damned if I don't Should I keep trying; is it time to punt? Damned if I stay, damned if I leave Will the shame never end, can I get a reprieve? If I could just go back to being a grouch Now the next stop…the Stress Doc's couch. Ouch!
While painfully scary, do not be so leery, It's a doubled-edged stage; let me tell you a story Of a tough egg on the outside; inside hollow and mushy Now known as Hump D, his path would prove bumpy
Covered with bling, compulsively doing his thing Always burning the candle, livin large on the wall This big eggo was just beggin for a great fall. So don't feel too sorry for Mr. Dumpty He needed to hit bottom, right on his rumpsky!
Closing Moral
Breaking out of a burnout hell May take cracking holes in that once rigid shell. Most won't reach out as long as there's doubt. Famous last words from Rambos and Nerds From those Rambettes and high flyin Birds: "Who needs help off the shelf…I can do it myself!" Alas, it's now crisis crossroad, no longer "more or less" - Reach out and meaningfully progress Hide out and critically regress.
Mark Gorkin, the Stress Doc ™, acclaimed Keynote and Kickoff Speaker, Webinar Presenter, Retreat Leader and Motivational Humorist, is the author of Practice Safe Stress and The Four Faces of Anger. A former Stress & Violence Prevention consultant for the US Postal Service, the Doc leads highly interactive, innovative and inspiring programs for corporations and government agencies, including the US Military, on stress resiliency/burnout prevention through humor, change and conflict management, generational communication, and 3 "R" -- Responsible, Resilient & Risk-Taking -- leadership-partnership team building. Email stressdoc@aol.com for his popular free newsletter & info on speaking programs. Check out his popular website -- www.stressdoc.com -- called a "workplace resource" by National Public Radio (NPR). Stress Doc Mantra: "Think out of the box, perform outside the curve (the Bell Curve) and be out-rage-ous!"
