My husband constantly gives me digs. He acts like everything I say has another meaning behind it. He has to know who I am texting and has supposedly found me, multiple times, on Internet porn sites. The fact is that I have never even held another man's hand let alone what he accuses me of doing.
He curses me with the most degrading names possible. He pulls my blankets off while I sleep to see "what I am doing" even if I am completely asleep. I've been choked, pulled by my hair and kidnapped against my will multiple times. When I tell him I am done he will take everything from me: keys, purse and telephone and then try to kick me out. He will tell me that he is going to hurt my family because they are in on "it."
He randomly calls me through the day and say that he is going to kill a new employee at my job because he knows "something is going on."
I married when him when I was only 19 because I was so in love. Deep down I know he really loves me. He always comes home when he is supposed to. He doesn't even think of other women and loves being a good dad.
Then there is my side where I am the victim and I want to run so far away from him that I never see him again. How can he go from locking me in a room and calling me "a dirty nasty whore" in front of my child and stepchildren to telling me how he loves me and wants to give me the world and die for me?
I love my husband more than any man in this world and want to continue a family with him for the rest of my life. But, I get to the point of knowing I deserve respect and dignity.
Is this really my life?
Anyone with give me advice please respond. I didn't know he has an actual mental disorder until I looked it up today. I have been telling my husband he is in a completely delusional state because of the off the wall accusations he makes. I am married to him for 7 years and I'm only 26. I am always walking on eggshells around him. I have no life and I have my own depression issues. At 19 I took on his 3 stepchildren and now have one child of my own. This is a horrible situation.
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