My husband has been having an affair for two years. We have since been to counseling and concluded that we want to stay and grow together in our marriage. We did beautifully in counseling, our communication was great and he said all the "right" things. Now we spend a great deal of special time together along with our two children. He tells me how much he loves and needs me, and that he is so happy with our closeness. I love the attention I am receiving and our relationship appears to be heading in the right direction. So what is my problem you ask? He is still deceiving me. Unknowing to him I have been monitoring his mobile phone bill and he is still calling her three times a day. He is also still paying for some of her bills. (I know, I am deceiving him by spying). When I ask him if he is still in contact with her he denies everything, straight faced and with heartfelt sincerity. He tells me I shouldn't be bothered with rumors because people are just trying to hurt us. He called her while we were on vacation together. I was ready to forgive and move on with our lives but I don't know how to deal with all the lies and deception. He has all of his important mail sent to a P.O. Box because once I opened a credit statement of his and he came unglued. He said I have no right and that I have violated him. He almost moved out because he can't handle my prying into his personal business. Every time I look I find something. I'm afraid that if I present him with the proof of his lying we will have a repeat episode of him leaving and I'm not ready to deal with that. I hate myself for being so weak. I have been on anti-depressants since I found out about his affair and now I believe I will never get off knowing what I know. We have been married ten years. I know he loves me but I am so confused. What is he up to?
THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.